I'm part of a nationwide IUD study, which is a great deal - basically getting paid to receive a reliable form of birth control plus gynecological care. The monthly, quarterly, and now semi-annual visits have always been interesting - a break in the routine, but also, who else is going to care about the particulars of my menstrual history or OTC drug usage? And the one time I accidentally pulled the IUD halfway out they examined its position in my uterus with an ultrasound wand. Cool, right?
Anyway, on these visits a doctor performs an obligatory string check to make sure the IUD is still in place. I always get undressed, usually completely, and don a paper gown. Today I was told to undress only the lower half, and to place the paper sheet across my lap. The doctor comes in, my feet go up in the stirrups, and she examines me from underneath the sheet of paper.
I know she's looking at me down there, and she knows I know. So the paper is just a pretense, and a flimsy one at that. One could almost argue that it's unnecessary, since it changes nothing about the procedure or the knowledge thereof.
Except it changes everything. Because while I know exactly what she is doing, I'm not watching it being done, so it is not blatant. The extra flimsy little something, in being unnecessary, is allowed to stand for something - and that is modesty, which for many people is a source of safety and comfort.
Kindness is like that piece of paper. A small, unnecessary gesture that changes little to nothing about the circumstances. Except it opens up that space where one can be vulnerable without being weak, naked without being exposed. A space that means the world.