I've been on and off sick this entire time in San Francisco, though being so determined to live every moment I haven't missed any school as of yet.
Right now though, it's a Friday school is off and I am able to lie in my bed and do nothing, which is a luxury I cannot help but be grateful for. And it is in these moments of gratitude where I want most for there to exist a God so I can give thanks to Him. (But even without I am sending this joy upwards and out, just because.)
And I have spoken about how people find God in their most intense moments of pain and suffering, where frailty and helplessness give them no other option but to pray. Which is different than how I find God, because when I'm suffering I seem to be extra self-reliant. (When I think of me suffering it's me being sick that comes to mind, and always there is a period when I am angry and super-motivated to conquer the illness, after which I just lapse into passivity, but I don't ask for help.)
Maybe I have never suffered to the extreme for which I would cry out for help. Maybe it is in my nature to limit all my negativities to myself and only share the positives.
In any case, all I know is that I am mighty glad right now.